I woke up at 6:15 this morning. I was so tired and didn’t want to get out of bed. My mind was exhausted from a long day of work yesterday and my body was tired due to an infection I’ve been taking antibiotics for. Pushing the OFF button to my alarm was never so tempting. Yet my first session was ... Read More »

For five years, I worked at a community college counseling center where I focused on providing individual and group therapy to queer students. Part of this work meant creating workshops and trainings to fellow staff members, faculty, students, and even audiences at national conferences about the ... Read More »

Given this past weekend was Valentine’s Day, I thought it’d be a great time to check-in on relationships, love, and what is naturally going to happen when people come together: conflict. The “Four Horsemen” are conflict communication styles the Gottman Institute has identified after years of rese... Read More »

Since November, I haven’t been very active on social media and haven’t written a blog post. I had been engaging pretty regularly before then and suddenly, I stopped. There were other things that slowed down in my life as well, such as working out, reading, journaling, meditating. I was getting bu... Read More »

The election is less than two weeks away in the U.S. and needless to say, there’s a LOT of emotions to be rightfully had about it. Fear, stress, anger, distrust, hurt, grief, even hope, are all completely valid to feel right now. For folks who are BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, women, undocumented/DACAmented, ... Read More »

It wasn’t until I started practicing therapy that I began to wrap my head around the idea of directing compassion inwards. Let me repeat that: it took becoming a therapist for self-compassion to cross my radar as a necessity, let alone an option. Before this, I heard advice sporadically about giv... Read More »

Our lives are fuller than they’ve ever been before. This is wonderful in many ways: we have multidimensional roles and identities that are fulfilling in their own right, we belong to different communities, and we’re productive with all the responsibilities that come with these - and how satisfyin... Read More »

TW: mention of physical and sexual abuse Yesterday started Domestic Violence Awareness Month, which was founded in 1981 by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) in order to unite advocates across the U.S. A heartbreakingly common experience of those who find themselves in viole... Read More »

Bisexual Awareness Week (September 16-23) is an extension of Celebrate Bisexuality Day (September 23), which was started in order to recognize and celebrate the bisexual+ community. This has special significance for me since I identify as bisexual and grew up not understanding this identity nor h... Read More »

As a psychotherapist, "mental health" is a term I hear and use often: I use it to describe the work I do, I hear it from clients and colleagues multiple times a day, it's even in my official, credentialed title in the State of New York ("Licensed Mental Health Counselor"). I first heard the phras... Read More »

I started struggling with perfectionism when I was seven years-old. That might sound awfully young, but that's when I started my career as a competitive gymnast. Gymnastics is all about striving for a score of Perfect 10.0, which means you performed your routine with zero flaws, falls, or fails. ... Read More »

Photo by mrgaoAs we got news this week that physical distancing will last until at least the end of April (at least in the States) and of a grim report of predictions from the president, I thought long and hard about what to write in this blog. I write a new one on the first of every month and it... Read More »

I know. There are a gazillion yoga videos out there these days. If you asked me even just one year ago if I thought I’d be adding another yoga video series to the mix, I would’ve looked at you like this: You may have observed (like I did) the rise in yoga videos on the internet in the last severa... Read More »

I sat for about ten minutes staring at the blinking cursor when I first started to write this blogpost. As much as I've been privileged to help other people on their journey to self-love, it's completely different when I direct that introspection towards myself. Even today, after practicing thera... Read More »

I was lucky enough to make this past weekend a long one in Southern California visiting some friends. On our last day, right before heading to the airport, we stopped at a restaurant in Manhattan Beach. We realized it was two blocks from the beach, so we walked down after we ate. We found a ledge... Read More »

There is so much joy, gratitude, and love to be felt and shared during the holidays. You might spend time sitting and talking with family, enjoying the company of people you are connected to. You might feel the anticipation of waiting for a loved one to open a present from you and hoping they lik... Read More »

Have you ever felt like you were "less than" someone else, whether they did something to make you feel that way or you just automatically felt it? The odds are that your answer is YES and you've probably felt this way multiple times in your life. Getty Images What's happening in those moments whe... Read More »

I first heard the term "mindfulness" when I learned about Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) in my mental health counseling graduate program. We were taught MBSR along with many other approaches and techniques for working with therapy clients. The professor taught us that MBSR was an evide... Read More »

What a month! This is Part 5 and the conclusion of #30daysofthanks. For the month of November I've been sharing one thing I'm thankful for from the last decade everyday in honor of the decade coming to an end and in the spirit of Thanksgiving. My expanded thoughts in this post will be a little sh... Read More »

This is a continuation of the #30daysofthanks project I am doing throughout the month of November. Every day, I am sharing one thing I am grateful for from the past decade on my Instagram story in honor of it ending. Read my expanded thoughts on what I'm thankful for so far in Part 1, Part 2, and... Read More »

A continuation from last week: For the month of November, I am sharing one thing every day that I'm thankful for from the last decade. Follow my Instagram story to see each of these daily. Read my expanded thoughts on the first 12 things I'm thankful for in Part 1 and Part 2! Jessie, September 20... Read More »

A continuation from last week: I am sharing 30 things that I am thankful for from the last decade every day this month on my Instagram story. I'm using this blog as a space to expand on each of these things. Check out Part 1 if you missed the first five! November 2019 As I said in my Instagram po... Read More »

In November of 2009, I was in my junior year of college and living in Southern California. I worked at Starbucks, had just started dating my ex, and was going to be leaving the country for the first time in January to study abroad for six months. I was just learning what it meant to be an adult, ... Read More »

During this time of the year, many of us like to indulge in things that get our adrenaline pumping, like watching scary movies and visiting haunted houses. It's all in the spirit and spookiness of Halloween where we play on some of our most basic fears (death, for one - I mean how many skeletons ... Read More »

In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I want to share one of the most powerful tools you can have at your disposal to prevent you or someone you know from being a victim of domestic violence: your rights in a relationship. Once you know what these are, you can recognize when they are bei... Read More »

I have been teaching weekly Queer Yoga classes at the Institute for Human Identity for the past several months and I thought now is as good a time as ever to reflect on what brought me to offer these in the first place. When I first had attractions towards others as a young kid, these feelings we... Read More »

Earlier this year, I reached 72 consecutive days of meditation - a personal record! Then, after two weeks of traveling (and still meditating), the time-change on the 17-hour flight home caused me to miss the midnight deadline and my personal record was gone.I was frustrated with missing the 73rd ... Read More »

You’ve been doing all the practice poses leading up to sirsasana (headstand) for several weeks.You’ve done it against a wall. You’ve even done it with bent legs without support. Today is the day that you will straighten your legs with no support from the wall and come in to the full expression of... Read More »

If there’s one thing I have heard time and time again in my career as a mental health counselor, it is: “I’m not good enough”. It may not always be expressed in these exact words, but the sentiment is there. These are all versions of the same story: Not enough. Yes, sometimes, the can’ts and the... Read More »